I’m dangerous as f then
So I could say I love cocaine because it makes me forget that I am waiting for some guy to call me. I can tell you I love speed because it lets me stay awake for days. I could claim that I love heroin because when I’m on it I just don’t care about anything at all. And it would be true, it would all be true. But it doesn’t matter anymore. I do drugs to do drugs. My loneliness, my self-pity, my romantic failures- those were all excellent reasons to pick up dope in the first place. But they don’t matter anymore. The world has gone on without me. Life has gone on without me. Things have changed. For all I know, I could be in New York, hang out with my friends and do good work, and fall in love- and not feel lonely at all. Who knows what my life would be like?
The circumstances that got me started on my addiction no longer exist. I’m doing what I’m doing because I just can’t stop.
— More, Now, Again by Elizabeth Wurtzel
— Ernest Hemingway (via kvtes)